Three-Alarm Cruncher

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Ingredients

Cut a 1/2-inch slit lengthwise down the center of each half-smoke. Insert sliced habaneros into the slits. Wrap 1 piece of bacon around each half-smoke, tucking the ends of the bacon in so it stays secure when frying (you can also secure with toothpicks).
Heat enough oil for deep-frying in a deep, heavy-bottomed saucepot. When the oil is hot (add a pinch of flour, and if it fries then the oil is ready, or use a deep-fry thermometer to check that the oil is at 350 degrees F), carefully add the bacon-wrapped half-smokes. Fry until the bacon is crispy, 2 to 3 minutes. (If you choose not to fry the half-smokes, you can cook them in a 400 degree F oven until the bacon is crispy, or in a saute pan with a dash of cooking oil.) Remove from the oil using tongs and place on a paper-towel-lined-plate to remove any excess grease.
Split the hot dog buns open and place the half-smokes inside. Top each hot dog with 1 tablespoon Three-Alarm Relish. Tuck 3 sport peppers between the bun and dog for each hot dog. Drizzle 1 teaspoon Sriracha onto each hot dog. Finish by sprinkling crushed jalapeno chips over all the hot dogs and serve.
Place the chipotles, Thai chiles, cherry peppers, jalapeno peppers, habanero peppers, cayenne, red chile flakes and hot sauce in a mixing bowl and combine using a spoon (do not use your hands, chiles are hot). When combined, set aside until ready to use.